Who killed Laura Palmer?
I have forgotten a lot from my childhood and adolescence, but the music of Angelo Badalamenti from the cult 90s TV series Twin Peaks is firmly etched in my memory. Someone called this movie stylish, and I agree with that 100%. Twin Peaks from 1990 is really stylish. I don't even know how to explain. I love films with a dynamic plot, Twin Peaks, on the contrary, tells the story slowly, however, I want to watch it again and again. There are a lot of strange characters, although no, they are ALL strange, but surprisingly cute.
So, when last year, on the eve of the world premiere of Twin Peaks 25 years later, Amedia began airing (thank God, 5-6 episodes in a row) the first and second seasons of the legendary series, it was impossible to drag me away from the TV. Almost simultaneously, the series began to be shown on TV-3. My favorite actors are Sherilyn Fenn and Kyle MacLachlan.
I got to see the beautiful Sherilyn Fenn only 20 years later in Shameless. She's grown fatter, older, of course, but still just as impressive, with sable eyebrows that run wild. Apart from “Shameless,” I haven’t seen her in other films. You can, of course, google it, but it’s not important. I like her most in Twin Peaks. And may she remain in my memory so young and beautiful.
I can’t help but mention Dale Cooper (Kyle MacLachlan) - FBI special agent, handsome, ideal man, coffee lover. Whatever you say, his character in Twin Peaks is damn good. I was glad to see him in Sex and the City and Desperate Housewives as Bree Van de Kamp's husband Orson.
I still didn't like Twin Peaks 25 years later. I couldn't understand what was happening. But today we’ll talk about “The Secret Diary of Laura Palmer,” written by David Lynch’s daughter Jennifer. It was published already in 1990 against the backdrop of global hysteria associated with “TP”.
The book is designed in the form of a diary. It's easy to read, the font is large, I read it in literally 3-4 hours. Laura appears before us not as an innocent lamb, but as a very, very bad girl, whose life includes sex, drugs, rock and roll, orgies, and a brothel. At the same time, as we know, Laura is loving and beloved, an exemplary daughter, the queen of the school, a beauty, a good friend, a volunteer, helps the elderly, delivers food, teaches Josie English, takes care of Audrey Horne’s disabled brother...
From her secret diary we learn about her relationship with Donna, how she met Leo, what affairs connected her and Bobby, about her acquaintance with the colorful Lady with the Log, why she visits Dr. Jacoby, why she decided to help Johnny, why she doesn’t like Audrey, what kind of person is she? there was Laura, what dark thoughts were swarming in her pretty head, what dirty secrets and secrets she was hiding, what, in short, she had sunk to.
Of course, the book mentions BOB, the one with the long hair, but I can’t understand whether this is her dreams, dreams or reality? Why did he choose her? Why couldn't she get rid of him? There are no answers to these questions. But in any case, interesting reading.
Dear Diary!
I ask you, Diary, help me explain to people:
I didn't want to become what I became. I just didn’t want to remember him and realize what happened between us. And I did only what someone else in my place could have done in a similar situation.…
All the best to you. With love, Laura.
P.S. For safety, I'm handing you over to Harold. Hope to see you again. I can't stay without coca any longer. There's no way I can. I need to forget.
THIS IS where the entries in LAURA'S DIARY END.
A FEW DAYS LATER HER CORPSE WAS DISCOVERED.
?. It is known that Laura kept a diary. Agent Cooper found him. Its contents became known to the audience only fragmentarily, and their curiosity was satisfied by Jennifer Lynch, a famous director and screenwriter, daughter of David Lynch. It is in this book that Laura Palmer's relationship with the mysterious infernal entity known as Bob is shown in its entirety and in development. The book Twin Peaks. The Secret Diary of Laura Palmer" was published by the publishing house "Azbuka". The translation is published in a new edition. The book also contains forewords written by Lynch and Frost more than twenty years after the release of the legendary series. publishes a fragment of the Diary.
Dear Diary!
Cousin Maddie should be arriving any minute. Dad went to the station to meet her alone because Mom didn’t allow him to wake me up. I only woke up fifteen minutes ago. No dreams, but mom says she heard me calling her and then screaming like an owl! I feel so stupid. According to her, she came into the room when I was not yet fully awake, but then... the hoot repeated, and then, as she says, I giggled, rolled over to the other side and fell asleep again. I hope she doesn't tell anyone about this. In fact, she likes to talk about such things over dinner with the Haywards or other guests. It always starts with the words: “A funny, extremely strange story happened to Laura...” And I know: now he’ll lay it all out.
One day she told everyone at dinner how I wandered into the kitchen in a sleepwalking dream, just when she herself was getting ready to go to bed. I calmly took off my pajamas, put them in the oven and walked naked back to my room. And now, every time I go to the stove at the Hayward house, if Donna and I are helping prepare dinner, Mrs. Hayward jokingly reminds me that the stove is a stove, not a washing machine.
That fateful evening, my mother drank more than she should, so I forgave her. But if he tells anyone about the owl calls, I’ll just die. I’m not sure that it ever happens that parents with their stories do not constantly make their children burn with shame. And mine are no exception.
But maybe if I stopped doing all sorts of stupid things in my sleep, then there would be nothing to tell her about then.
The rest will come later.
Dear Diary!
I have so much news for you. I'm writing this sitting inside the fort that the three of us built - Donna, Maddie and me. Mom and Dad allowed us to play here as long as we didn't run too far. We built the fortress from boards that Ed Harley gave us, and Dad helped us put them together. Donna, however, says that if a real thunderstorm starts, then we are screwed, but I personally believe that no matter what happens, our home will stand.
Frame: Twin Peaks series
Maddie is such a beauty right now. She is sixteen, and I envy her life so much... How I wish I was sixteen too! She has her own boy and she misses him. He called her here to find out if she got there well. Dad began to make fun of her. He says she was really cute on the phone, but Maddie isn't offended by him. Donna thinks that by the time she gets her boyfriend, she will be at least forty and already starting to go deaf. I told her she was just crazy. The boys are already hovering around us, and we ourselves are not paying attention to them. I wonder what it will be like to be loved by someone other than my own parents. Will he call if I go on a trip to see if I'm okay?
Before we moved into our fort, Donna, Maddie and I went to the stables to see Troy. The girls said that they had never seen anything like this in their lives, he was so handsome. We fed him there together. And what did I do to deserve such happiness - to get Troy! Donna has been dreaming of a pony for years, but her father never bought her one. How many years will Troy live, I wonder? I will probably cry all my life after his death.
Donna just saw what I wrote about Troy's death. She says that I am too focused on sad things - there is no telling what will happen if all this continues. But Donna doesn't know half of what I know. Therefore, it is simply impossible for me not to think about sad things sometimes. Because at such moments it is most dear to me.
Mom gave us sandwiches and two thermoses with us. One with cold milk, the other with hot chocolate. Maddie doesn't drink more than one cup of hot chocolate. You see, chocolate gives her acne. Where did she get this from? No matter how much I look, I don’t see a single pimple on her face. Maddie started having her period three years ago, and to listen to her, it’s just a nightmare: rashes, cramps, fatigue, anger... In a word, lovely. Another one for the joy that awaits me! By the way, my mother started getting her period right at my age, although I still hope, it’s not at all necessary that I get my period at the same time, that is, this year. After Maddie described them to me, I'm not at all eager to have something like that.
In our fortress we all eat mom’s sandwiches, drink milk and write in our diaries. Maddie's is so big and fat. Donna's isn't the same, but it's still thicker than mine. It’s okay, I promise that I will have you even more than Maddie. I like that from now on all my thoughts will be collected in one place, as if in my head, so that I can always look there if I want. We hung a lantern from the ceiling of our home so that we had light and could see everything. True, a little light came through the windows, but we covered them so that, as it was decided, not to ruin the impression of our forest retreat. The blanket and provisions that we took with us make us feel like real forest dwellers. Although we are located very close to the house, in the outskirts! Maddie says she has a pack of cigarettes with her and when Mom and Dad fall asleep, we can smoke one each if we want. True, the cigarettes, according to her, are already old, because they have been lying around for a long time: all this time she never touched them, because she was afraid that her parents might catch her. Maybe I'll take a chance and try. Donna says she doesn't want to smoke, and Maddie and I aren't going to force her to, because that's not the way to behave between friends. But I guarantee that I can make Donna change her mind if I just look at her properly. You will see.
The rest will come later.
Frame: Twin Peaks series
Well, I'm back to you.
We laughed so hard that our stomachs still hurt. Maddie told us how she and her boy tongue kissed, and Donna and I went crazy. Donna grimaced and said that she hated the thought of it, and I pretended that I did too... but to be honest, Diary, when I heard how it was done, I got a strange, very special feeling in my stomach . Not at all similar to... however, it doesn’t matter. In a word, it seemed to me that kissing with tongues could be a very pleasant thing and I could do it as soon as I have a beloved boy. Maddie said she was terribly afraid at first. But now she's been kissing this way for several years now - and she likes it. I told them how last month I walked into my parents' bedroom - they weren't expecting me because I had a fever and couldn't get out of bed - and saw them both naked. Dad was on top. I immediately left the room, and a few minutes later my mother came to me and brought me aspirin and Seven-Up pop. She didn't say a word about what happened. Donna says they definitely had sex, I already knew that, but they didn't seem to enjoy it too much. It seemed to me that they were just moving slowly and not even looking at each other.
Maddie suggested that they were most likely having some “light pampering.” Ufff! Wow, my parents are having sex. What dirt! I, of course, know that it was from her that I was born, but if I don’t see this again, I won’t worry too much. I give you my word: if I ever have to have sex, I will try to get much more pleasure out of it than they do.
We just had mom and dad over to say goodnight. They told Donna that her parents had told her on the phone to tell her that she wouldn't have to go to church tomorrow, so she could stay the night with us. We were all very happy about this.
Dad asked us all to close our eyes and keep our palms open, and then he put a chocolate bar in each outstretched hand. He only asked that we not say anything to mom. After him, my mother came and gave me a small package, warning me that my father should not find out about it. There were three more chocolate bars in the bag! Maddie looked at her chocolate bar and sighed sadly: “Pimples.” She couldn't say anything else. Nevertheless, she unwrapped both chocolates and, like the rest of us, put them in her mouth. Afterwards, with our mouths full of chocolate, we tried to sing “Sail, Sail, Our Boat.” Then Donna said that the chewed chocolate looked like what Troy left behind, and we all had to spit it out.
Can you imagine what a terrible story Maddie told us. One family left home for the night, and when they returned, they found murderers in their home, just waiting for their return. There was still a lot of scary stuff there, but to be honest, I didn’t really want to remember it. Otherwise I'll have nightmares later. Donna went out to pee and Maddie admitted that she had bad dreams too. She just didn't want to talk about it in front of Donna because she might take it the wrong way. So, for example, she dreams that I am wandering in a dark forest. But then Donna returned, and Maddie fell silent. I wonder if Maddie has seen the long-haired one? Did you feel the breath of the wind? Maddie writes her poems in a journal because she says it's more fun than using the same boring, ordinary words all the time. And then, if someone gets into the hands of a diary, then this person is unlikely to be able to understand everything that is written there. Prose is one thing, poetry is another. I'll have to try it myself tomorrow.
The rest will come later.
Frame: Twin Peaks series
Ha! I told you I could get Donna to smoke. Maddie pulled one cigarette out of the pack and lit it herself, then handed it to me to try. I liked exhaling smoke from my mouth. It's like I'm releasing a swaying, flowing, dancing spirit. It seemed to me that I was a completely grown woman, people were sitting around me, staring - and envying me. Even Donna said I look really grown up when I smoke. But I didn’t even drag on! I wonder how I would feel if I actually took a puff?
It was Donna's turn, and before she could refuse, I blurted out, “I'm glad I tried it, and I don't have to do it again if I don't want to.” Then she took a cigarette and blew a few rings of smoke upward. Donna also looked good with a cigarette in her mouth, but then she got scared of something, took a sip of smoke and coughed loudly, so we had to urgently put out the cigarette and ventilate our fortress - in case mom and dad suddenly woke up and decided to come to us look in. For myself, I decided that one day I would buy a pack of cigarettes and hold it, like Maddie does. I am sure that smoking will not become a habit for me. I'm too careful for that.
And now we go to bed, and we all say goodbye to our diaries. Good night. I think that you and I will become good friends.
With love, Laura
Translation by Yuri Katsnelson
Frame: Twin Peaks series
Dear Diary!
So, when I came down to breakfast this morning, I saw that my mother had hung garlands all over the house and even my serious dad had put on a ceremonial top hat and was blowing the pipe with all his might in my honor. Donna and I were laughing so hard!
Yes, Donna is my best friend in the world. Her last name is Hayward, and her father, Dr. Hayward, helped give birth to me exactly twelve years ago! I can't believe this finally happened. At the table, my mother shed tears. She says: before you know it, I will become a completely grown woman. That's for sure! Although I don't have periods, and it may be years before I get them. So it seems to me. She's crazy if she thinks that I'm about to become an adult, and she continues to give me stuffed animals for my birthday!
Today everything was the way I wanted: just Donna, Mom and Dad - and no one else. And of course. Jupiter, my cat. For breakfast, my mom made my favorite apple pancakes, a big jar of maple syrup, and a whole platter of fancy bread.
Donna gave me a blouse I had seen in the window of Horne's department store. I know she bought it with her own money, saved it for a long time, but did not tell me why. This is the most amazing blouse you can imagine! It is white, silk and all covered with small embroidered roses, but there are not so many of them to spoil the impression. As good as it gets. For Donna's birthday, I will definitely give her something special too.
My cousin Madeleine, we just call her Maddie, is coming to stay with us tomorrow and will stay for a whole week. The three of us, she. Donna and I intend to build a fortress in our forest and live there, if only my mother allows it. I have no doubts about dad. He, like me, loves the forest. One night I had a dream that my dad took us to a house in the thick of the woods, and right in front of my bedroom window there was a large tree where two songbirds had built a nest.
L now. Diary, I have to stop for a minute. Dad is calling me from downstairs. He says he has a surprise for me! I'll tell you everything as soon as I get back!
With love, Laura.
Dear Diary!
You can't even imagine what happened! I went downstairs, and dad told mom and I to quickly get into the car and not ask questions while we were driving. Mom, of course, pestered him with questions all the way. I didn’t particularly think about it: what if dad lets it slip. But he didn't speak. And I kept quiet so as not to spoil the upcoming surprise. When the car stopped at the Broken Circle stables, I knew! Dad bought me a pony! He is so beautiful, you can’t even imagine him in your dreams. Light brown with dark brown tints, and the eyes are large and gentle. Mom simply couldn’t believe it when she saw him, and immediately began asking dad how he managed to keep everything a secret. Dad replied that if she had known about the purchase in advance, the whole surprise would have been lost. I think he's right.
Mom almost had a heartbreak when she saw that I reached under his belly and looked between his legs to determine whether he was a boy or a girl. It didn't take me a second to understand: it was a boy. What, I’ve never seen this before! And mom thinks that she knows everything about her daughter, ha ha!
But let's get back to my pony. I decided to call him Troy, as in Mrs. Larkin's photo album. The groom Zippy promised to make a sign with the name “TROY” written in large letters and hang it around the pony’s neck so that everyone would know his name. Troy is still too small to ride, but in two months I will be able to saddle him and gallop through the fields. Today I already took him around and fed him carrots (Dad took them with him and kept them in the trunk) and a piece of sugar that Zippy gave me. Troy ate it all with pleasure. Before we parted, I whispered into his warm soft ear that we would see each other tomorrow, but for now I would write everything about him in my diary. I can't wait for Donna to see him! I almost forgot:
Maddie will see him too!
On the way back, Dad said that Troy and I had the same birthday, because when ponies are given to someone who will truly love them, then from now on they have everything in common. So happy birthday to you too. Troy!
I'm glad from the bottom of my heart that I don't know anything about where he came from, because now I can think of him as a messenger from heaven.
So, Diary, tomorrow is a big day, and tonight I will sleep well and dream of Troy and all the time we will spend together. There is no one happier than me in the whole world!
With love, Laura.
P.S. I hope BOB doesn't show up today.
Expensive. Diary!
It's already late at night and I still can't sleep. Before this I had some nightmares, so I decided that I would not sleep a wink again. It’s okay, Maddie is arriving today, and after a tiring journey, she will probably want to rest. Then I can sleep too. And if the sky is bright for days, then my dreams will not be so dark.
One of the nightmares was especially scary, and I woke up in tears, immediately afraid that my mother could hear my crying. She, of course, will come here to console me, but I just want to be alone. But she doesn't understand this. She always comes to me when I'm awake and sings "Matildine Waltz." And now she would sing it too. It’s not that I didn’t want to hear her sing, but the whole point is that in my dream one person sang the same waltz in my mother’s voice - and I was so scared that I couldn’t move from fear.
I dreamed that I was walking in the forest past Pearl Lake, and the wind was so strong that it knocked me off my feet, but for some reason only near me. Heat. Wind. And twenty feet away from me, this man with long hair and huge calloused hands. So terrible and rude. He sang and kept holding them out to me. His beard did not flutter from the wind, because the wind was blowing only on me. The tips of his thumbs were black as coal. Without ceasing, he described circles in the air with them, and his hands came closer and closer to me. Despite all my fear, I continued to slowly move towards him. This happened as if against my will.
“I have your cat,” he said, and at these words Jupiter flashed behind him and immediately disappeared into the thicket of the forest, like a white speck on a sheet of black paper.
1Dear Diary!
So, when I came down to breakfast this morning, I saw that my mother had hung garlands all over the house and even my serious dad had put on a ceremonial top hat and was blowing the pipe with all his might in my honor. Donna and I were laughing so hard!
Yes, Donna is my best friend in the world. Her last name is Hayward, and her father, Dr. Hayward, helped give birth to me exactly twelve years ago! I can't believe this finally happened. At the table, my mother shed tears. She says: before you know it, I will become a completely grown woman. That's for sure! Although I don't have periods, and it may be years before I get them. So it seems to me. She's crazy if she thinks that I'm about to become an adult, and she continues to give me stuffed animals for my birthday!
Today everything was the way I wanted: just Donna, Mom and Dad - and no one else. And of course. Jupiter, my cat. For breakfast, my mom made my favorite apple pancakes, a big jar of maple syrup, and a whole platter of fancy bread.
Donna gave me a blouse I had seen in the window of Horne's department store. I know she bought it with her own money, saved it for a long time, but did not tell me why. This is the most amazing blouse you can imagine! It is white, silk and all covered with small embroidered roses, but there are not so many of them to spoil the impression. As good as it gets. For Donna's birthday, I will definitely give her something special too.
My cousin Madeleine, we just call her Maddie, is coming to stay with us tomorrow and will stay for a whole week. The three of us, she. Donna and I intend to build a fortress in our forest and live there, if only my mother allows it. I have no doubts about dad. He, like me, loves the forest. One night I had a dream that my dad took us to a house in the thick of the woods, and right in front of my bedroom window there was a large tree where two songbirds had built a nest.
L now. Diary, I have to stop for a minute. Dad is calling me from downstairs. He says he has a surprise for me! I'll tell you everything as soon as I get back!
With love, Laura.
Dear Diary!
You can't even imagine what happened! I went downstairs, and dad told mom and I to quickly get into the car and not ask questions while we were driving. Mom, of course, pestered him with questions all the way. I didn’t particularly think about it: what if dad lets it slip. But he didn't speak. And I kept quiet so as not to spoil the upcoming surprise. When the car stopped at the Broken Circle stables, I knew! Dad bought me a pony! He is so beautiful, you can’t even imagine him in your dreams. Light brown with dark brown tints, and the eyes are large and gentle. Mom simply couldn’t believe it when she saw him, and immediately began asking dad how he managed to keep everything a secret. Dad replied that if she had known about the purchase in advance, the whole surprise would have been lost. I think he's right.
Mom almost had a heartbreak when she saw that I reached under his belly and looked between his legs to determine whether he was a boy or a girl. It didn't take me a second to understand: it was a boy. What, I’ve never seen this before! And mom thinks that she knows everything about her daughter, ha ha!
But let's get back to my pony. I decided to call him Troy, as in Mrs. Larkin's photo album. The groom Zippy promised to make a sign with the name “TROY” written in large letters and hang it around the pony’s neck so that everyone would know his name. Troy is still too small to ride, but in two months I will be able to saddle him and gallop through the fields. Today I already took him around and fed him carrots (Dad took them with him and kept them in the trunk) and a piece of sugar that Zippy gave me. Troy ate it all with pleasure. Before we parted, I whispered into his warm soft ear that we would see each other tomorrow, but for now I would write everything about him in my diary. I can't wait for Donna to see him! I almost forgot:
Maddie will see him too!
On the way back, Dad said that Troy and I had the same birthday, because when ponies are given to someone who will truly love them, then from now on they have everything in common. So happy birthday to you too. Troy!
I'm glad from the bottom of my heart that I don't know anything about where he came from, because now I can think of him as a messenger from heaven.
So, Diary, tomorrow is a big day, and tonight I will sleep well and dream of Troy and all the time we will spend together. There is no one happier than me in the whole world!
With love, Laura.
P.S. I hope BOB doesn't show up today.
Expensive. Diary!
It's already late at night and I still can't sleep. Before this I had some nightmares, so I decided that I would not sleep a wink again. It’s okay, Maddie is arriving today, and after a tiring journey, she will probably want to rest. Then I can sleep too. And if the sky is bright for days, then my dreams will not be so dark.
One of the nightmares was especially scary, and I woke up in tears, immediately afraid that my mother could hear my crying. She, of course, will come here to console me, but I just want to be alone. But she doesn't understand this. She always comes to me when I'm awake and sings "Matildine Waltz." And now she would sing it too. It’s not that I didn’t want to hear her sing, but the whole point is that in my dream one person sang the same waltz in my mother’s voice - and I was so scared that I couldn’t move from fear.
I dreamed that I was walking in the forest past Pearl Lake, and the wind was so strong that it knocked me off my feet, but for some reason only near me. Heat. Wind. And twenty feet away from me, this man with long hair and huge calloused hands. So terrible and rude. He sang and kept holding them out to me. His beard did not flutter from the wind, because the wind was blowing only on me. The tips of his thumbs were black as coal. Without ceasing, he described circles in the air with them, and his hands came closer and closer to me. Despite all my fear, I continued to slowly move towards him. This happened as if against my will.
“I have your cat,” he said, and at these words Jupiter flashed behind him and immediately disappeared into the thicket of the forest, like a white speck on a sheet of black paper.
And the man continued to sing, and although I tried to tell him that I wanted to quickly go home with Jupiter, I could not utter a sound. Then he suddenly raised his hands high, high, and it seemed to me that he was growing right before our eyes, turning into a real giant. And as his hands reached up, I felt that the wind around me was dying down and silence was falling. It seemed to me that he was letting me go because he read my thoughts. In any case, that's what I decided. So when he stopped the wind with his hands, I thought: he has freed me, and I can now go home.
Lynch Jennifer
The Secret Diary of Laura Palmer (Twin Peaks)
Jennifer Lynch
Twin Peaks
The Secret Diary of Laura Palmer
Dear Diary!
So, when I came down to breakfast this morning, I saw that my mother had hung garlands all over the house and even my serious dad had put on a ceremonial top hat and was blowing the pipe with all his might in my honor. Donna and I were laughing so hard!
Yes, Donna is my best friend in the world. Her last name is Hayward, and her father, Dr. Hayward, helped give birth to me exactly twelve years ago! I can't believe this finally happened. At the table, my mother shed tears. She says: before you know it, I will become a completely grown woman. That's for sure! Although I don't have periods, and it may be years before I get them. So it seems to me. She's crazy if she thinks that I'm about to become an adult, and she continues to give me stuffed animals for my birthday!
Today everything was the way I wanted: just Donna, Mom and Dad - and no one else. And of course. Jupiter, my cat. For breakfast, my mom made my favorite apple pancakes, a big jar of maple syrup, and a whole platter of fancy bread.
Donna gave me a blouse I had seen in the window of Horne's department store. I know she bought it with her own money, saved it for a long time, but did not tell me why. This is the most amazing blouse you can imagine! It is white, silk and all covered with small embroidered roses, but there are not so many of them to spoil the impression. As good as it gets. For Donna's birthday, I will definitely give her something special too.
My cousin Madeleine, we just call her Maddie, is coming to stay with us tomorrow and will stay for a whole week. The three of us, she. Donna and I intend to build a fortress in our forest and live there, if only my mother allows it. I have no doubts about dad. He, like me, loves the forest. One night I had a dream that my dad took us to a house in the thick of the woods, and right in front of my bedroom window there was a large tree where two songbirds had built a nest.
L now. Diary, I have to stop for a minute. Dad is calling me from downstairs. He says he has a surprise for me! I'll tell you everything as soon as I get back!
With love, Laura.
Dear Diary!
You can't even imagine what happened! I went downstairs, and dad told mom and I to quickly get into the car and not ask questions while we were driving. Mom, of course, pestered him with questions all the way. I didn’t particularly think about it: what if dad lets it slip. But he didn't speak. And I kept quiet so as not to spoil the upcoming surprise. When the car stopped at the Broken Circle stables, I knew! Dad bought me a pony! He is so beautiful, you can’t even imagine him in your dreams. Light brown with dark brown tints, and the eyes are large and gentle. Mom simply couldn’t believe it when she saw him, and immediately began asking dad how he managed to keep everything a secret. Dad replied that if she had known about the purchase in advance, the whole surprise would have been lost. I think he's right.
Mom almost had a heartbreak when she saw that I reached under his belly and looked between his legs to determine whether he was a boy or a girl. It didn't take me a second to understand: it was a boy. What, I’ve never seen this before! And mom thinks that she knows everything about her daughter, ha ha!
But let's get back to my pony. I decided to call him Troy, as in Mrs. Larkin's photo album. The groom Zippy promised to make a sign with the name "TROY" written in large letters and hang it around the pony's neck so that everyone would know his name. Troy is still too small to ride, but in two months I will be able to saddle him and gallop through the fields. Today I already took him around and fed him carrots (Dad took them with him and kept them in the trunk) and a piece of sugar that Zippy gave me. Troy ate it all with pleasure. Before we parted, I whispered into his warm soft ear that we would see each other tomorrow, but for now I would write everything about him in my diary. I can't wait for Donna to see him! I almost forgot:
Maddie will see him too!
On the way back, Dad said that Troy and I had the same birthday, because when ponies are given to someone who will truly love them, then from now on they have everything in common. So happy birthday to you too. Troy!
I'm glad from the bottom of my heart that I don't know anything about where he came from, because now I can think of him as a messenger from heaven.
So, Diary, tomorrow is a big day, and tonight I will sleep well and dream of Troy and all the time we will spend together. There is no one happier than me in the whole world!
With love, Laura.
P.S. I hope BOB doesn't show up today.
Expensive. Diary!
It's already late at night and I still can't sleep. Before this I had some nightmares, so I decided that I would not sleep a wink again. It’s okay, Maddie is arriving today, and after a tiring journey, she will probably want to rest. Then I can sleep too. And if the sky is bright for days, then my dreams will not be so dark.
One of the nightmares was especially scary, and I woke up in tears, immediately afraid that my mother could hear my crying. She, of course, will come here to console me, but I just want to be alone. But she doesn't understand this. She always comes to me when I'm awake and sings "Matildine Waltz" And now she would sing it too. It’s not that I didn’t want to hear how she would sing, but the whole point is that in my dream one person sang the same waltz in my mother’s voice - and I was so scared that I couldn’t move from fear.
I dreamed that I was walking in the forest past Pearl Lake, and the wind was so strong that it knocked me off my feet, but for some reason only near me. Heat. Wind. And twenty feet away from me, this man with long hair and huge calloused hands. So terrible and rude. He sang and kept holding them out to me. His beard did not flutter from the wind, because the wind was blowing only on me. The tips of his thumbs were black as coal. Without ceasing, he described circles in the air with them, and his hands came closer and closer to me. Despite all my fear, I continued to slowly move towards him. This happened as if against my will.
