List of advantages and benefits
You will need:
– a sheet of paper and a pencil;
– time for reflection.
Be prepared for:
– the fact that it will be difficult to find advantages and benefits;
– the fact that the list will have to be reviewed regularly.
This may not be useful if:
– you have already compiled a similar list during psychological training or in preparation for another interview.
There are very reliable way To become confident in your decision to find a job and be confident at an interview is to make a list of your advantages and advantages over your competitors. Compose it not in your head, but on a piece of paper. This is simply necessary so that you can clearly see their presence. Need to borrow comfortable spot(for some it is more comfortable at a table, for others in a cozy chair), take a piece of paper and divide it in half with a line. At the top, write the “Advantages” and “Benefits” sections. In the “Advantages” column, make a list that includes personal character traits and personality traits. The “Advantages” column contains your features that distinguish you as a professional and a self-confident person. Perhaps some points will overlap with each other, do not make any special distinctions where exactly one of the points should be included. Theoretically, there should be fewer advantages, since they are built on the basis of advantages, but not every advantage can become an advantage. For example, speaking English is definitely an asset. But, if you expect to get a position where English is mandatory requirement, this dignity will not become an advantage, since it will be present in all candidates. In this case, any additional foreign language can be an advantage.
You don’t have to show this list to anyone, it’s only needed to raise your self-esteem and self-esteem. Next we will look at the most common and important qualities character and professional skills. All you have to do is think about whether you have them and add them to the list of your advantages and advantages.
1. Sociability – readiness for interpersonal communication, to take initiative in conversation with any social categories of people. If you are not intimidated by the prospect of meeting, talking and establishing friendships and business relationships with many strangers, you love to chat and enjoy participating in conversations, then you definitely have this quality.
2. Openness is a state of your psyche in which you can calmly and even willingly accept words and actions in your direction from other people. Openness to communication, self-criticism and, as a result, the ability to perceive any words painlessly, readiness for personal questions and sincerity in answers are all signs of this quality.
3. Balance is also a mental state in which you are not influenced by external stimuli. This is the ability not only to control oneself, but also to prevent excessive emotions from appearing at all. This character trait implies the absence of special outbursts of both positive and negative emotions.
4. Contact – readiness to cooperate with people, implies both initiative and acceptance of other people’s initiatives. If you quickly find topics for conversation that will interest both you and your interlocutor, if business relationships are quickly established, this is your plus.
5. Friendliness - the ability to add a shade of personal sympathy to personal communication. If, in addition to communication, you know how to sympathize with people regardless of their social status and appearance, if you treat them with warmth and understanding, then feel free to add this item to your list.
6. Politeness – adherence to etiquette in interpersonal relationships. Even in the most stressful situations, maintaining polite behavior and not resorting to insults and personalities is an absolute plus to your polite words.
7. Non-conflict – the ability not to succumb to other people’s provocations, to restrain oneself and direct positivity towards this situation. Note these advantages in your own sense if you have not noticed yourself being excessively picky towards people and the desire to annoy them, and if you know that any problem can be solved not by shouting, but by simple negotiations.
8. Responsibility is a quality due to which you clearly understand what and why you need to do, and do it without fail, realizing that this is your job, and only you can finish what you started.
9. Composure - readiness to use all the necessary resources of your mind and body: a state in which you keep yourself in good shape and concentrate your strength. A collected man does without swaying the right job, he does not need to tune in for a long time to the atmosphere, tone and type of activity.
10. Initiative - promoting your ideas, views, opinions, actions independently. You are the owner of this quality if you are able to start and complete a task without constant outside advice, adding your own personal ideas to it.
11. Intelligence – this refers to the level of your intelligence, your horizons of knowledge. The higher your knowledge, the better you understand all manifestations of the outside world, the more you understand people and know how not to look at them through the prism of your own emotions, the faster you think, the higher your level of intelligence.
12. Not talkative - this means the ability not to interfere in other people's affairs and not to gossip. If you like to discuss someone with someone, you do not have this quality.
13. Originality is a quality that distinguishes your mental and behavioral reactions from the standards of others. If you are not subject to the “herd instinct”, are not afraid to defend your opinion, different from others, your reactions to stimuli are sometimes directly opposite to those of others - then you are an extraordinary person.
14. Sociability – having a broad horizon of knowledge and positive personal qualities. The ability to adapt to any style of communication, to any person and situation, qualifications in all areas of knowledge required by your profession. Put this item on the list if you think that you know how to find a common language with all social strata.
15. Diplomacy – the ability to maneuver in a conversation, avoiding pitfalls and negative aspects. A diplomatic person does not go towards his goal abruptly and directly, but studies the situation and chooses the least emotional option for developing and conducting a conversation.
16. Persistence – the ability to achieve what you need. This good quality, which helps not to shy away from difficulties, but to overcome them, achieving positive or negative results, and trying to get to the goal over and over again.
17. Learning ability – the ability to quickly perceive and process new information. If you quickly grasp new concepts on the fly, delve into the essence of issues, strive to expand your horizons and do not give in to difficult problems, but learn from the experience of solving them - you have high level learning ability.
18. Originality - the ability to find several ways to approach situations and people. Mark this quality if you can find several solutions to the same problem depending on changing circumstances.
19. Loyalty - recognition of the authority of a higher-ranking employee, the absence of pronounced rebellion. If you realize that your immediate superior will have more developed professional qualities, and you will not openly compete with him, even if this is not the case, then you will make a good subordinate.
20. Activity – physical and mental, the speed of metabolic processes in the brain and between the head and body. An active employee reacts quickly to changes, has defensive reactions against difficulties, is proactive and efficient, and overcomes internal and external restrictions in all areas of life.
21. Punctuality – adherence to strict time frames. Implies responsibility and composure in the performance of official duties.
22. Creative thinking - creating projects and thought processes that go beyond standard thinking. If you know how to think about professional problems, then the solution approaches will be unusual and effective.
23. Equanimity – the ability to restrain one’s emotions in an unfavorable atmosphere. If you maintain your integrity in any situation and don't let irritation ruin your mood, this will add an item to your list.
24. Determination – the desire to reach the intended height at any cost. What is your favorite saying: “The ends justify the means”? You are a very purposeful person.
25. Optimism – the ability to see the positive in all events. There is a saying: “For optimists, the glass is always half full, and for pessimists, it is always half empty.” Choose for yourself how you feel about it, and draw a conclusion accordingly.
26. Qualification – sufficient education for work. The higher the level of training specific to your job profile, the more qualified employee you are.
27. Imagination – the ability to “dream”, fantasize, and invent situations. People with the gift of imagination are a boon for an enterprise, as they can think through all the logical chains of events.
28. Experience – having work experience in exactly the position (and in the field) for which you are going. This can be an important advantage over candidates.
29. Composure is the ability not to react to any physical actions of other people. If you look at open wounds without shuddering and stand boldly on your feet, even if the whole world around you is collapsing, this is a huge plus. You will be able to evaluate actions from the outside and act with a cool mind.
30. Spontaneity is a mental state in which a person does not adhere to the strict framework of conservative behavior, but shows liveliness and varied interests. Of course, this is a little childish behavior, but colleagues always like a lot of sincerity and friendliness.
31. Adequacy – understanding and perception of reality as it is. If you understand exactly how to determine the degree of complexity of a situation and select the necessary reaction, you are an adequate person.
32. Spirituality - having wealth spiritual world. If you try to understand your existence, where, why, why and how you live, believe in God and recognize the divine essence of human existence, you will be a very interesting person to communicate with.
33. Integrity - exposure to certain postulates of behavior. If, in spite of everything, you do not betray your inner principles, but live guided by them, then you are an integral person, non-capricious and consistent.
34. Positivity – non-aggressive perception of the world around us, good deeds and sublime thoughts. This is a defensive reaction of the psyche; life is much easier for a person with positive thinking.
35. Tactfulness – understanding the boundaries of the interlocutor’s personal zone. If you understand that some things simply cannot be asked of people, since they are painful for them, if you know how to stop at the barrier of separation in time general topics and intimate, you have a sense of tact.
36. Delicacy - a gentle approach to the problems of the interlocutor. Delicate people are valued for their ability not to open the complexes in the personalities and lives of other people.
37. Objectivity – the ability to concentrate on one object, realistically assessing all the pros and cons of a situation, and not superimposing one’s own feelings on the assessment of the situation. This can also include self-criticism, since such a person will definitely not allow emotions to prevail over reason and is aware of the state of things based on the standards of thinking.
38. Impulsivity is the tendency to act on the first impulse, spontaneously. Sometimes this quality helps in solving production problems.
39. Flexibility is a person’s ability to adapt to changing conditions.
40. Ability to speak foreign languages. If you have linguistic abilities, this is a definite item on the list of advantages.
Although it is believed that man was created by God, in His image and likeness, he is a sinful and imperfect being. However, a person’s advantages are as undeniable as his shortcomings. And these shortcomings include such unsightly qualities as pride, greed, envy, condemnation, intolerance, stubbornness, and so on, the list can go on for a long time. Many of these qualities, unfortunately, are ingrained in a person from childhood, that is, they are the result of improper upbringing of a child in the family by parents.
A person’s strengths and weaknesses do not appear in him suddenly and suddenly, this is understandable. To form distinctive features Everyone has a hand in the child’s character, starting from the parents themselves and their immediate circle, and continuing with kindergarten, school, and so on. For example, if in childhood a child was constantly pushed, forced to rush, when he was forced to run a large number of circles and sections, try to do everything in time, otherwise he will be scolded - he develops such a quality as impatience. Stubbornness also appears when parents always try to go against the will of the child and cause him constant feeling protest, and permissiveness, on the contrary, leads to licentiousness and arrogance.
The shortcomings, like the advantages of a person, of course, have deep roots. Greed can form in a child from a lack of love and attention, and this can also lead to despair and despondency, which will then lead to self-abasement. Then a boss will appear who will suppress his will, so fear, hypocrisy, and servility will arise in the person, which will in no way lead him to self-respect and self-esteem.
What are human dignity, how are they expressed in life and character? Actually, according to Dahl’s dictionary, dignity is respect, a set of fairly high moral qualities. And it should not be confused with arrogance, these are completely different things. When they say that this one means that he is worthy of respect, thanks to his valuable personal qualities, behavior in society, actions, and so on. If a person begins to inflate his price, he becomes arrogant, thus losing respect for the honor and dignity of the individual. Therefore, you need to understand that these are completely different things.
A person’s advantages and disadvantages continue to be formed even when he leaves childhood, under the influence of society. A positive assessment of his behavior and actions elevates him in the eyes of the public. This can give him strength and desire to fight his shortcomings and strive for further improvement. A negative assessment by public opinion can lead to aggravation of these shortcomings, therefore, ideally, this assessment should be objective.
Recognition by society of a person’s dignity means a certain assessment regarding his moral qualities. The more strongly such qualities as honesty, respect for people, nobility, goodwill, sincerity, modesty, sensitivity, and so on are manifested in him, the greater the value such a person represents for society. Accordingly, if parents want to raise their child as a worthy member of this very society, they must lay down and develop in him these
These also include:
Modesty. This is when a person, even having many advantages, behaves simply and unnoticed, without sticking them out or boasting.
Shame and conscience. Believers say that it is the voice of God inside a person that tells him what is good and what is bad and leads him to the desire to repent of his bad actions.
Honor. These are also worthy of respect from society.
One who has this will never insolently insult anyone, humiliate or insult another.
This is the advantage of communicating with a person who has honor and dignity.
By studying the personality of a person, be it a woman, a man or a child, one can always identify a bad tendency to unseemly behavior due, for example, to errors in upbringing or psychological trauma. But even bad heredity can be protected. Let's consider the main negative traits of human character.
The desire to dominate in everything, ignoring any needs of other people. An explicit or hidden demand for submission and discipline from everyone with whom a person intersects. Other people's opinions are not taken into account, any disobedience is suppressed without an attempt to find a mutually beneficial solution. It is believed that this is a typical negative trait of the Russian character.
The desire to conflict with others. In early childhood, this is an obligatory negative character trait of a child learning ways to protect his interests. Provocative, sometimes deliberately false statements, elevated tone, and insults are typical for an aggressive adult. Sometimes attempts are made to influence the opponent physically.
A painful desire to achieve a set goal, regardless of the size of the risks, ignoring one’s own and others’ logical arguments about the excess of the amount of spending over the value of the desired result. Often causes situations leading to death, loss of health or significant financial losses.
Pathological desire for personal material gain in any situation. Getting profit at any cost becomes the only source of positive emotions in life. In this case, the duration pleasant sensations from the benefits received is extremely short-lived - due to an uncontrollable constant desire to enrich yourself even more.
Lack of emotional response to most external stimuli due to a particular temperament or due to the body’s protective reaction to stress. It is one of the reasons for the impossibility of achieving even simple goals due to the inability or unwillingness to concentrate and make volitional efforts.
Negligent fulfillment of obligations due to unwillingness to act according to rules already known to everyone or lack of understanding of the algorithms necessary to quickly and least costly achieve existing goals. Often this is a typical negative character trait of a woman who has just escaped from excessive parental care.
A real or consciously demonstrated lack of interest in a specific subject, object, event, responsibilities due to innate emotional coldness, experienced severe stress or, instilled from infancy, a sense of superiority over people with a different social status, a different faith, nationality, race.
A consciously chosen, imposed during upbringing or conditioned by moral immaturity position of refusal to real awareness of the consequences of one’s own actions, reluctance to make decisions that affect one’s own and others’ quality of life. In difficult everyday situations, active actions are not taken due to the expectation that the problem will resolve on its own.
The absence of individual traits, which is why an individual subject is easily “lost” in the general mass of people like him. In the process of communication, the “gray man” does not evoke sympathy due to his fixation on uninteresting topics; in a team he is uninitiative, boring, afraid of innovations and resists them in every possible way.
Emotional indifference to other people's troubles, inability or unwillingness to sympathize, sympathize with people in particular and living beings in general, experiencing physical or emotional pain. Sometimes it is deliberate inhumanity in actions that lead to suffering and even death of the objects chosen as victims.
Intentional or unconscious violation of norms, the sequence of actions adopted in a given society in relation to some specific situation. The reason for deliberate cheekiness may be the desire to provoke a conflict or draw attention to one’s own person, unconsciously - errors in upbringing, emotional immaturity.
A painful need to constantly participate in a dialogue with one or more interlocutors, regardless of the content of the conversation, the degree of enthusiasm of the other participants, or the relevance of the conversation. The main goal of such an interlocutor is not to obtain new information, but to play the role of a storyteller when contacting someone. At the same time, he can disseminate information that others would prefer to keep secret.
Inability to keep any promises and take into account other people's interests, lack of ability to move for a long time to achieve one goal, desire for constant change of circle of friends and partners. Lack of principles and clear behavioral boundaries, rapid fading of interest in a specific activity or person.
A passionate desire for control over everyone and the expectation of unquestioning obedience, the desire for unlimited power, especially over the more educated and skilled. Intoxication with one’s own superior position in situations where others are forced to seek help or seek protection or material support.
In pathological form, this is a subconscious tendency to perceive behavior imposed from outside without one’s own conscious comprehension and weighing the results of one’s actions performed under the influence of someone else’s authority. However, reduced suggestibility can cause learning difficulties.
Inability to find a balance between originality and vulgarity in communication, when choosing clothes, social guidelines, and so on. For example, during a dialogue, the interlocutor speaks in a raised tone, is mannered, and does not disdain dirty jokes. When choosing an outfit, he prefers flashy things, and constituent elements often do not fit well together.
The inability or unwillingness to determine logically correct conclusions even from the simplest everyday problems, the tendency to see the grain of wisdom in pseudoscientific and populist statements, the inability to subject information from sources that are independently elevated to the status of authoritative to a reasonable critical analysis.
Confidence in the social, moral, mental insignificance of others, the inability to forgive for personal and other people’s mistakes, denial of the possibility of other subjects of society having worthy characteristics. It develops against the background of distortions in upbringing, personality degradation due to illness, immaturity of the individual, coupled with high social status.
Reluctance to adhere to the polite format of communication with interlocutors accepted in normal society due to personality deformation due to illness, injury, stress or the frequent need to take a defensive position when territory and rights are encroached upon. Typical manifestations: communication in a raised voice, rudeness, obscene language.
The desire to minimize costs even at the expense of health, basic hygiene and common sense. A pathological pursuit of material stability can manifest itself in the form of a refusal to get rid of garbage, junk, or ignoring reasonable requests from a loved one to purchase essentials.
The desire to cause discomfort to living subjects for the sake of personal moral satisfaction. The impact on the victim can be both intangible - in the form of insults and refusal to satisfy some important emotional needs, and physical - through infliction of pain, torment, and encroachment on life.
Inability to remember some data necessary in everyday life, a combination of actions to achieve a certain goal, an algorithm for starting or turning off a device. It occurs due to age-related changes in the brain and information overload. It may be a consequence of a stressful situation that you want to forget.
The desire to derive pleasure from performing actions or using a certain substance, even if the source of pleasant emotions harms health, relationships with others, leads to large financial expenses, pushes to crime due to the desire to achieve a “high”, in the absence of legal access to it.
Inability to enjoy any personal benefits, achievements, qualities. The tendency to constantly compare the values of oneself and others. Moreover, the “crumbs” on the other side always seem larger, tastier and more desirable than their own “placers”. In a pathological form, it deprives one of cheerfulness and the ability to soberly evaluate one’s own and others’ merits.
Constant belittlement in one’s own eyes of one’s own natural talents, trained abilities, denial of the value of personal achievements, inability to force oneself to declare personal achievements in a circle of authority figures. Formed due to overly strict upbringing, psychological trauma or disease of the nervous system.
The habit of lecturing everyone, everywhere, repeatedly discussing the same topic, despite the obvious lack of interest in it among the people who are trying to be drawn into dialogue. The reason lies in the pathological love of attention and endless conversations on any topic, even provided that the instigator of the conversation is a complete layman on the topic being discussed.
An emotional manifestation of strong dissatisfaction with something, a landmark indicating the presence of clearly uncomfortable conditions for a person. In the absence of actions that eliminate the cause of the feeling, over time it can push one to commit an offense, so manifestations of anger should not be ignored.
The bad habit of demanding that your desires be fulfilled as soon as possible, without taking into account the capabilities of the person to whom the claim is made. Refusal to control and restrain one's own needs, to tolerate the slightest inconvenience, and to personally exert emotional and physical effort to achieve what one wants.
Lack of desire to strain for personal needs, tendency to spend idle time all day long. The behavior reveals a desire to obtain comfort at the expense of the work of others, a deep aversion to useful activities even in minimal quantities. When applying for a job, this negative character trait should not be indicated on your resume.
Consciously systematically expressing false information to interlocutors for slanderous purposes, for one’s own benefit or to disguise personal failures in some activity. The pathological form is inherent in insecure individuals who try to impress others with fictitious stories about themselves.
Feigned assurances of love, sincere admiration and goodwill towards the interlocutor during a conversation with him. The purpose of such behavior is ingratiation and the desire to flatter for one’s own benefit, while hiding true, perhaps even malicious, sentiments towards the participant in the dialogue or the object of the conversation.
A tendency to excessively constantly praise out loud the real and imaginary merits and virtues of others, for the sake of one’s own self-interest. The object of exaltation can also be obviously negative actions, the actions of an influential person, specially whitewashed by the flatterer and voiced by him as the only correct solution in the situation under consideration.
In a pathological form, this is the desire to find out information of interest, regardless of decency, personal feelings of those being questioned and the situation of the situation in which communication takes place. The reason for unhealthy curiosity is a painful desire to be aware of even those events that are not related to the person showing interest.
The habit of attaching great importance to one’s insignificant statements and actions. The widespread emphasis on one's imaginary achievements as opposed to the truly important and heroic actions of those around them. Attention to ordinary details to the detriment of values, the desire to obtain reports on household expenses down to “one thousandth”.
The tendency to focus personal attention on all small and large troubles, everyday conflicts, and invented grievances, in order to be sure to repay each of the offenders a hundredfold over time. In this case, the duration of the time interval from the moment of receiving a real or imaginary insult does not matter.
Unceremonious behavior in any situation, the desire to achieve what you want with minimal costs and “over the heads” of others. Such behavior is formed due to improper upbringing, due to a difficult childhood or, conversely, due to spoiling, which has reinforced the habit of always getting what you want at any cost.
The perception of the majority of others as subjects of an obviously lower category due to an imaginary difference in social status or real differences in material, national, racial or other characteristics. The reason may be a defensive reaction to wounded pride in the past or distortions in upbringing.
Inability or unwillingness to independently deal with emerging problems, have fun or relax. The reason may lie in emotional immaturity, fear of loneliness, a desire to increase self-esteem through active participation in the lives of other people, even if they experience obvious discomfort from this and openly declare it.
Unreasonable and groundless praise of oneself, narcissism under any circumstances, the desire to embellish the results of one’s actions and the actions taken themselves, selfishness, indifferent attitude not only towards strangers, but also close people, interest only in personal comfort and benefit.
Reluctance to qualitatively fulfill assumed or assigned obligations, neglect in behavior with people in everyday or professional relationships, insufficient attention to trusted values, inability - due to poor education or personal deformation - to understand the importance of diligence when working on something.
Increased negative reaction to everyday troubles due to hypertrophied selfishness. It is because of him that you want the world to spin at your feet, and those around you, forgetting about their own needs, to live up to your expectations around the clock and all year round: they were polite, generous and caring, and strived to ensure the comfort of others.
Confidence that the true picture of the world is accessible only to you, and other explanations of the structure of the universe and the principles of interaction between man and the environment are a complete invention of narrow-minded louts. It occurs due to insufficient education, a congenital developmental defect that prevents the adequate assimilation of educational information.
The tendency to accept as reality the imaginary catastrophic consequences of any, even minor incidents in one’s own life and the world as a whole. It is a manifestation of bad upbringing by a reinsurer, an overly violent fantasy or a disorder of the nervous system due to stress or illness.
A penchant for pretentious outfits, demonstration of real or ostentatious material security through the acquisition of unnecessary luxury items. Or, and sometimes both, a passion for dirty jokes, obscene anecdotes, often voiced in a completely inappropriate environment for the sake of causing a feeling of awkwardness among the majority of listeners.
A negative reaction to a stimulus, expressed in excessive expression of emotions, the intensity of which does not correspond to the strength of the influence of a factor that is unpleasant for some reason. The cause of irritability can be external or internal, caused by overload of the nervous system or exhaustion of the body by illness.
Inability to rationally spend income, including the desire to systematically or constantly make acquisitions for the sake of the process itself, and not for the purpose of exploiting the purchased item or thing. It is based on the desire to feel like “the ruler of the world”, to correspond to the status of a financially secure person.
Showing dissatisfaction or distrust of a subject who has a certain value for the jealous person. It is expressed by suspicion of infidelity or a greater emotional predisposition towards another person (not only a spouse, but also a mother, sister, friend may be in the place of the accused - the list can be endless).
The habit of justifiably and unreasonably convicting oneself of many sins different sizes. For example, insufficient attention to fulfilling duties, although in reality a person gives his all at work or in relationships. Possible reasons: low self-esteem, actively supported by an interested environment, perfectionism.
Unreasonable exaltation of one's abilities, supposedly allowing one to cope with a certain or any task. Is the cause of bragging and risky behavior, often committed with a rejection of safety rules, the laws of physics and the arguments of logic. Based on inexperience, dependence on the desire to live on the brink of a foul.
Lack of ability to perform volitional effort for the sake of a desired goal or to resist dangerous, illegal temptations, morally degraded individuals. Tendency to submit to other people's decisions, even when they require serious sacrifices. Such a negative character trait of a man can make him an object of ridicule in the team.
The inability to resist an opponent due to insufficiently developed willpower and susceptibility to phobia. Can be expressed by fleeing the scene of some events due to an imaginary or real danger for one’s own health and life, despite leaving other possible participants in the incident in danger.
The desire to receive praise for real and imaginary merits. The desire first of all to have a positive image, and not to be worthy of compliments. Indiscriminate quality of voiced approvals - flattery is also perceived favorably. Moreover, it is not always possible to distinguish it from sincere statements.
The desire to act only in accordance with one’s own ideas about the correctness of the chosen path, rejection of authorities, ignoring well-known rules purely because of the habit of acting as one has decided. Lack of ability to be flexible when interests clash, unwillingness or inability to take into account the goals and capabilities of others.
Conscious self-love, the desire to live in comfort, regardless of the possible inconveniences resulting from this for others. Their own interests are always exalted above the desires of other people, the opinions of the latter on this and other matters are never taken into account. All decisions are based only on one’s own benefit.
Let's take a look human strengths and weaknesses from the point of view of the unshakable wisdom of our ancestors.
According to the Vedic scriptures, as a source of knowledge, there are criteria by which a person can be judged.
And, if we talk about the advantages and disadvantages of a person, then the Vedas describe a total of 29 of them.
Of these, there are 16 main advantages, and, accordingly, 13 qualities that it is desirable to suppress in your character.
Therefore, I propose that we first consider those qualities that we need to develop and cultivate, and then those that are worth fighting.
The 16 main qualities include the following. The ability to tolerate life circumstances and possible character defects of other people. Regarding patience, this does not mean “stupidly” coming to terms with life and everything it gives.
This means that when difficulties come into life, you need to perceive them with due care and calm, knowing that this happens for a reason. It is somewhat similar to patience - restraint.
This is a quality that manifests itself when a person evaluates life and circumstances from the point of view of reasonableness and common sense. Feelings do not overcome such a person, which means the chances of offending another or splashing out negativity are sharply reduced.
Persistence is another important point. This means perseverance in the face of what fate has in store for you. The Vedas say that you should not give up if life becomes difficult. It is necessary to perk up and hold the possible blow of life with your head raised.
I also forgot to say that even if you already know and keep in your head the advantages and disadvantages of a person, you are already taking the first steps towards finding permanent happiness in life. The next point is truthfulness and the absence of any envy.
With truthfulness, it seems clear, but a few words need to be said about envy. There is such a thing as white envy. Here a person does not envy another, with the desire to master what has already been accumulated, but wants to achieve the same on his own.
At the same time, absolutely respecting the one who already has the desired object. This is normal. It also turns out that procreation is also one of those important issues that a person should treat with care. big share seriousness and responsibility. Just conceiving a child is half the battle. But conceiving it correctly is another matter.
And there are also spiritual qualities, which I will only list. These include: study of the sacred scriptures, observance of the commandments that are given there, selfless service to God and offering him gifts in the form of fruits or household items, asceticism and self-detachment.
Asceticism and self-detachment are glorifying God and not being carried away by the illusion of the material world.Now let's talk about 13 shortcomings. When studying a topic about a person’s strengths and weaknesses, it is necessary to concentrate more on the former.
Therefore, we will not delve too deeply into human vices, but will simply list them. We list them only to understand what we will need to work with. These include: debauchery and lust, which are now developed in many people.
Envy, anger and cruelty. Showing anger and ignorant gossip. Arrogance and pride. Oppression of others and one's own despondency and joylessness. As well as attraction to endless material pleasures and aversion to those who are in trouble.
Having studied the advantages and disadvantages of a person, there will be little point if you only know them and do nothing. It is clear that it will not be possible to develop all the good things in yourself and make yourself perfect in a couple of months, since this may take several years. But constant and systematic progress will make you a person for whom everyone will reach out. As an example, I recommend that you take a look at the Russian guys who conquer the peaks of Moscow without insurance (I got goosebumps and my heart was pounding from watching):
Therefore, everyone has a certain list of certain advantages and disadvantages. What could all this depend on? Upbringing, attitude and even belonging to a certain sector of the zodiac circle.
What does this concept mean? Is it possible to make a list of a person’s shortcomings? What imperfections exist? It could be cowardice, laziness, lying, etc. However, you should not be too categorical, because sometimes various flaws can be turned into positive sides and make good use of it.
It is worth noting that the list of human shortcomings can be divided into several categories. Thus, there are universal human character flaws that are purely feminine and purely masculine. As for the general negative aspects of a personality, it can be rudeness towards others, the inability to keep secrets, constant lies, the desire to stand out from others, while humiliating people. However, such a character trait as the desire to tell the truth about a person to his face may be considered correct by some people, and condemned by others, it all depends on how much the interlocutor liked the information received. Here we can draw a definite conclusion that there are no absolutely objective shortcomings, it all depends on the person’s point of view. Thus, people manage to justify even white lies, placing them closer to the positive side.
The list of shortcomings of a person of the fairer sex may seem interesting and even somewhat useful, i.e. women. After all, a modern lady is a person with a special set of shortcomings, including not necessarily negative ones. So, today women are often double-minded, this is necessary in order to reach a fairly high level in certain circles. And at the same time callous and wooden, so as not to waste your emotions in vain. Negative qualities are also supplemented by tactlessness (granny syndrome), greed, and excessive consumerism. Most girls today are capricious, mannered and overly confident in their own irresistibility. List of human shortcomings (in in this case- women) can be supplemented by modesty (oddly enough, in the modern world this is more of a disadvantage than an advantage), as well as talkativeness, which can be attributed to both good and not very pleasant aspects of character.
It is also worth considering the advantages and disadvantages of gender - men. Thus, the negative aspects of a guy’s character include untidiness (unwashed and unironed clothes, dirty shoes, unclean hair, nails, etc.), greed, stinginess, and pettiness. It is also not good if a man is jealous or rude (especially with ladies). Boring, unpunctuality, and stupidity will not work out for the better for a representative of the stronger sex. It is worth noting that patriarchal views are also a man’s flaw, because he believes that in addition to work, a woman should also take care of the house, because this is not the work of a representative of the stronger sex (and there are still quite a lot of such nuances).
We looked at the person, this list is far from complete. It can be replenished day after day. However, as was said above, it will most likely be individual, subjective, because in such a matter the personal attitude to Pure objectivity is important, truth simply does not exist in the world, everything is the work of one person or group of people.
The appearance of a person consists of a variety of advantages and disadvantages. In accordance with personal qualities, behavioral signs are formed by which others evaluate inner world interlocutor. A proverb has long appeared in the Russian language, testifying to the importance of intellectual and spiritual components - “They are greeted by their clothes, but they are seen off by their minds.”
A person’s shortcomings, reflected in personal qualities and behavioral characteristics, are not a death sentence, but an opportunity to improve throughout life.
It is not surprising, because behind a well-groomed appearance, complemented by exquisite wardrobe elements, even a skilled flatterer and a deceitful hypocrite will not be able to hide own disadvantages. The shortcomings and advantages of a person are numbered in hundreds of names, so it is almost impossible to mention every character trait. However, there are typical images of people endowed with the most common qualities that are quite easy to recognize.
Common Benefits: Social Benefits
It is impossible without learning to harmoniously combine the strengths and weaknesses of character. Successful marriages are characterized by the compatibility of partners who have successfully accepted each other's strengths and weaknesses. The search for a “golden” mean that allows you to remain yourself and evoke sympathy from others is a life goal that appears on a subconscious level since childhood. The first step towards personal improvement can be taken by adding positive qualities to your image:
To achieve the desired result, complementing your inner world with the above qualities, you need to work hard. Main principle, on which training programs for self-improvement are based - control of one’s own emotions, which provoke people to crazy and senseless actions.
It is not customary to talk about one’s own merits in society; it is more rational to show one’s personal qualities in dialogue so that the interlocutor notices them independently
Having identified common advantages, it is impossible not to mention the typical shortcomings inherent in the moral character of people in the 21st century. Only after eliminating the following qualities from your own image can you count on a successful result, reaching a new stage in the process of personal self-development:
Disadvantages and advantages are a complex of human qualities that create individuality. It is not surprising that some people easily find a common language, while others cannot tolerate their interlocutor at the genetic level
In the first stages of self-development, try to succumb less to emotional impulses, subjecting your own thoughts to careful analysis. Don’t be afraid to listen, but remember the advisability of an objective assessment of the upcoming action. After a short period of time, certain “barriers” will be developed on a subconscious level that do not allow shortcomings to break out without your permission. Only after reaching such a stage can the procedure for improving personal appearance be considered a successful “event”.
If you do not learn to accept your shortcomings and appreciate your strengths, then there is a risk of occurrence. A person who is not ready for who he is is doomed to mental imbalance and mental instability. Having taken this fact for granted, it is easier to take the path of correction, improving and transforming your own disadvantages into advantages.
Human defects are qualities of mental and physical organization that are considered undesirable and can reflect a person’s personal, behavioral and physical manifestations, including his actions and taste. Those. relate to absolutely any sphere of human manifestation, but do not satisfy either the person directly or someone who evaluates the personality. The advantages and disadvantages of a person have a subjective radical as the main one for determination. The impossibility of an unambiguous and static division of qualities into good and bad introduces confusion into the delimitation and classification of human manifestations as shortcomings or advantages. Also, in different situations that introduce different semantic contexts, the same actions have different interpretations as a manifestation of a disadvantage or an advantage (for example, a quick response, without taking into account the smallest details, is a disadvantage in family life, while in a situation of military danger this quality plays a primary role) role and is considered a virtue).
Mention of a flaw implies a context of little or no something, although the same is true of character (lack of patience or honesty).
Personality shortcomings mean vices and weaknesses that take the form of addictions or spinelessness of character; this also includes the manifestation of negative qualities from the category and. A person’s strengths and weaknesses are polar manifestations, one helps to move forward, achieve success, evokes respect, the second destroys a person’s destiny, rebuilds his personality, by making him weak, preventing success, pushing him to unworthy or even illegal actions and is the main reason for disrespectful attitude and avoidance of social interaction.
Disadvantages are usually presented as a characteristic that is a characteristic of a person for a fairly constant and long time. Everything that happens situationally and not systematically can be called inappropriate behavior, and emphasize Special attention on such isolated manifestations it does not stand as strongly as with the permanent variant.
There is an opinion that even the shortcomings in a loved one are liked, but, unfortunately, love is not so powerful as to withstand serious personal changes that affect the lives of others. It’s one thing when this feeling allows you to accept some kind of sloppiness, but coming to terms with uncontrollable outbursts against the background of alcohol addiction with subsequent beatings is unlikely to help. Accordingly, expecting that the world will continue to spin around and accept everything as it is has neither meaning nor hope; shortcomings need to be corrected, replacing them with worthy behavior and manifestation, learning new ones life strategies, otherwise self-indulgence will lead to complete personal degradation and destruction of life.
From a similar concept of acceptance, some preachers of humility try themselves and advise others not to get rid of shortcomings, but to accept them. And the idea itself is very wonderful, it is about accepting and valuing one’s self, but it is impossible to show self-love while leaving destructive behavior active. Any type of addiction is latent, any resentment takes up space and mental energy where love could be located, time spent on quarrels cannot be returned to create. Any manifestation requires resources of time and energy, which means that by spending them on unworthy things, you yourself deprive some effective part of yourself of the opportunity for realization. Honestly admitting a shortcoming and looking for a profitable and useful trend to replace it with is a better way. It is to replace, and not just to eradicate, since the empty space will require filling and it is better to choose in advance what you want to achieve or what to develop in yourself, before another takes the place of one shortcoming.
Just as all human nature has a physical and mental side of manifestation, so also the shortcomings are divided in relation to these areas. Mental disabilities include any deviations from the mental norm confirmed by a medical-psychological commission (including intellectual-mnestic and speech disorders, deviations in the emotional and mental sphere, developmental delays). Physical disabilities include any deviations from normal criteria for physical development that limit physical, mental and social activity and are confirmed by a specially created medical commission.
These two types of deficiencies have normative criteria and are objectively recognized, but when it comes to talking about human shortcomings, most people will not remember mental and physical ones, referring them rather to the sphere of clinical diseases, while defining some personal manifestations as shortcomings. It is the characterological characteristics and patterns of interaction that are considered those shortcomings that need to be fought and which a person is to some extent able to overcome on his own.
Criticism of one's own behavior most often includes spinelessness and the inability to refuse. What prevents you from living your life, and in some cases contributes to the special exposure of your needs, while being quite convenient for those around you. The reasons lie in the desire to please everyone, and deliverance entails a certain restructuring of life. You will have to understand that not all your friends like you; many simply take advantage of your reliability; you will have to accept your own aggression and strength, and learn to handle them, and not push them into the darkest corner, as before. The inability to defend your interests and refuse people speaks of problems with intrapersonal boundaries and the ability to defend them - see if you are in a codependent relationship and how much of your own life you have left.
The next trait that does not add advantages to your interaction with society is arrogance, and it has been noted that it is shown extremely rarely to strangers in real life, but in relation to a close circle of people or on the Internet, statements with an arrogant look and in a humiliating form are increasingly appearing. others. This is driven by an illusory sense of security (it’s harder to get an unflattering answer from a loved one than from a stranger) and problems with. The world is full of people, better and worse than you, but neither the first nor the second manifestation is your concern, everyone is free to do as they please. You can call for humility endlessly, but think about why it is so important for you to remain at the imaginary peak, criticize and strive to establish your own rules, is there really nothing else to do in your own life other than increase your importance in such ways?
Somewhere nearby the need to control may arise, and it’s good if it turns out to be the surrounding space, and you nag your household for placing jars in the wrong order in the kitchen, and if this begins to concern the lives, actions and choices of others, then be prepared for the fact that those around you They will soon howl and run away. Again, talking about violating boundaries and invading someone else's life. Taking responsibility only for yourself and giving advice only when asked - this is approximately the state of affairs you should strive for.
Many attribute the shortcomings to groundless, bordering on and not allowing either partner to live in peace. This is not considered a manifestation of passion or fear of losing; at the level of sensations, this is perceived as distrust or even an insult in that such thoughts are allowed. Soon, excessive jealousy brings with it another drawback, which can exist separately -. Not counting white lies, which is also a dubious undertaking, the reputation of a liar did no one any good, and ruined quite a few relationships.
There are many negative features; only those complaints about which are more common were considered, but in any case, when identifying shortcomings, one should focus on one’s own system of values and feelings (among killers, killing is a craft that has been honed over the years and is respected, but it is unlikely to become a big deal dignity for a teacher in a children's group).
When starting a relationship with someone, we usually fall into thinking that the person is ideal, but over time, the efforts to present only our positive qualities decrease and the real picture opens up and the curtain of raging hormones falls and it turns out that there is not such a prince nearby. Those who are lucky even like the shortcomings in their loved one and can find similarities in these moments, but then these qualities cannot be considered direct shortcomings in the partner’s system of perception of the world; rather, it is about an imposed social image. But when some manifestations of your partner begin to infuriate you, and you try to eradicate them, it means that you are faced with something that is a flaw in your life model.
It is worth noting that the adjustment of the behavioral and emotional manifestations of the other begins on both sides, consciously or not, since differences in characters without appropriate changes will lead to the impossibility of peaceful existence on the same territory. What to consider as shortcomings everyone decides (or rather feels) independently, but on the basis of habitual attitudes and family scenarios in parental families. But there are qualities and signals that require analyzing the possible consequences.
This includes being consistently late without regard for the value of your opinions, time, or plans. Rudeness, manifested towards others, relatives, and you personally. Perhaps it is a verbal form of violence, shouting or the use of force - a person’s inability to restrain his own impulsiveness and aggression is a critical shortcoming for building relationships. Excessive jealousy can please self-esteem at the beginning, but then turns into a manifestation of possessiveness and restriction of your freedom.
Any flaw, before revealing itself fully and causing irreversible damage to your life or psyche, manifests itself in minor moments; there is nothing that indicates the possibility of manifestation or worsening of the situation. So, in order not to participate in rehabilitation activities, think about it at the beginning and be attentive to details.
List of advantages and benefits
You will need:
– a sheet of paper and a pencil;
– time for reflection.
Be prepared for:
– the fact that it will be difficult to find advantages and benefits;
– the fact that the list will have to be reviewed regularly.
This may not be useful if:
– you have already compiled a similar list during psychological training or in preparation for another interview.
There is a very reliable way to confirm your decision to find a job and be confident at an interview - this is to make a list of your advantages and advantages over your competitors. Compose it not in your head, but on a piece of paper. This is simply necessary so that you can clearly see their presence. You need to take a comfortable place (for some it is more comfortable at a table, for others in a cozy chair), take a piece of paper and divide it in half with a line. At the top, write the “Advantages” and “Benefits” sections. In the “Advantages” column, make a list that includes personal character traits and personality traits. The “Advantages” column contains your features that distinguish you as a professional and a self-confident person. Perhaps some points will overlap with each other, do not make any special distinctions where exactly one of the points should be included. Theoretically, there should be fewer advantages, since they are built on the basis of advantages, but not every advantage can become an advantage. For example, speaking English is definitely an asset. But, if you are hoping to get a position where English is a mandatory requirement, this advantage will not be an advantage, since all candidates will have it. In this case, any additional foreign language can be an advantage.
You don’t have to show this list to anyone, it’s only needed to raise your self-esteem and self-esteem. Next, we will go over the most common and important character traits and professional skills. All you have to do is think about whether you have them and add them to the list of your advantages and advantages.
1. Sociability – readiness for interpersonal communication, to take initiative in conversation with any social categories of people. If you are not intimidated by the prospect of meeting, talking and establishing friendships and business relationships with many strangers, you love to chat and enjoy participating in conversations, then you definitely have this quality.
2. Openness is a state of your psyche in which you can calmly and even willingly accept words and actions in your direction from other people. Openness to communication, self-criticism and, as a result, the ability to perceive any words painlessly, readiness for personal questions and sincerity in answers are all signs of this quality.
3. Balance is also a mental state in which you are not influenced by external stimuli. This is the ability not only to control oneself, but also to prevent excessive emotions from appearing at all. This character trait implies the absence of special outbursts of both positive and negative emotions.
4. Contact – readiness to cooperate with people, implies both initiative and acceptance of other people’s initiatives. If you quickly find topics for conversation that will interest both you and your interlocutor, if business relationships are quickly established, this is your plus.
5. Friendliness - the ability to add a shade of personal sympathy to personal communication. If, in addition to communication, you know how to sympathize with people regardless of their social status and appearance, if you treat them with warmth and understanding, then feel free to add this item to your list.
6. Politeness – adherence to etiquette in interpersonal relationships. Even in the most stressful situations, maintaining polite behavior and not resorting to insults and personalities is an absolute plus to your polite words.
7. Non-conflict – the ability not to succumb to other people’s provocations, to restrain oneself and direct positivity towards this situation. Note these advantages in your own sense if you have not noticed yourself being excessively picky towards people and the desire to annoy them, and if you know that any problem can be solved not by shouting, but by simple negotiations.
8. Responsibility is a quality due to which you clearly understand what and why you need to do, and do it without fail, realizing that this is your job, and only you can finish what you started.
9. Composure - readiness to use all the necessary resources of your mind and body: a state in which you keep yourself in good shape and concentrate your strength. A collected person does the necessary work without hesitation; he does not need to take a long time to tune in to the atmosphere, tone and type of activity.
10. Initiative - promoting your ideas, views, opinions, actions independently. You are the owner of this quality if you are able to start and complete a task without constant outside advice, adding your own personal ideas to it.
11. Intelligence – this refers to the level of your intelligence, your horizons of knowledge. The higher your knowledge, the better you understand all manifestations of the outside world, the more you understand people and know how not to look at them through the prism of your own emotions, the faster you think, the higher your level of intelligence.
12. Not talkative - this means the ability not to interfere in other people's affairs and not to gossip. If you like to discuss someone with someone, you do not have this quality.
13. Originality is a quality that distinguishes your mental and behavioral reactions from the standards of others. If you are not subject to the “herd instinct”, are not afraid to defend your opinion, different from others, your reactions to stimuli are sometimes directly opposite to those of others - then you are an extraordinary person.
14. Sociability – having a broad horizon of knowledge and positive personal qualities. The ability to adapt to any style of communication, to any person and situation, qualifications in all areas of knowledge required by your profession. Put this item on the list if you think that you know how to find a common language with all social strata.
15. Diplomacy – the ability to maneuver in a conversation, avoiding pitfalls and negative aspects. A diplomatic person does not go towards his goal abruptly and directly, but studies the situation and chooses the least emotional option for developing and conducting a conversation.
16. Persistence – the ability to achieve what you need. This is a good quality that helps you not to shy away from difficulties, but to overcome them, achieving positive or negative results, and trying to get to your goal over and over again.
17. Learning ability – the ability to quickly perceive and process new information. If you quickly grasp new concepts on the fly, delve into the essence of issues, strive to expand your horizons and do not give in to difficult problems, but learn from the experience of solving them, you have a high level of learning ability.
18. Originality - the ability to find several ways to approach situations and people. Mark this quality if you can find several solutions to the same problem depending on changing circumstances.
19. Loyalty - recognition of the authority of a higher-ranking employee, the absence of pronounced rebellion. If you realize that your immediate superior will have more developed professional qualities, and do not openly compete with him, even if this is not the case, then you will make a good subordinate.
20. Activity – physical and mental, the speed of metabolic processes in the brain and between the head and body. An active employee reacts quickly to changes, has defensive reactions against difficulties, is proactive and efficient, and overcomes internal and external restrictions in all areas of life.
21. Punctuality – adherence to strict time frames. Implies responsibility and composure in the performance of official duties.
22. Creative thinking - creating projects and thought processes that go beyond standard thinking. If you know how to think about professional problems, then the solution approaches will be unusual and effective.
23. Equanimity – the ability to restrain one’s emotions in an unfavorable atmosphere. If you maintain your integrity in any situation and don't let irritation ruin your mood, this will add an item to your list.
24. Determination – the desire to reach the intended height at any cost. What is your favorite saying: “The ends justify the means”? You are a very purposeful person.
25. Optimism – the ability to see the positive in all events. There is a saying: “For optimists, the glass is always half full, and for pessimists, it is always half empty.” Choose for yourself how you feel about it, and draw a conclusion accordingly.
26. Qualification – sufficient education for work. The higher the level of training specific to your job profile, the more qualified employee you are.
27. Imagination – the ability to “dream”, fantasize, and invent situations. People with the gift of imagination are a boon for an enterprise, as they can think through all the logical chains of events.
28. Experience – having work experience in exactly the position (and in the field) for which you are going. This can be an important advantage over candidates.
29. Composure is the ability not to react to any physical actions of other people. If you look at open wounds without shuddering and stand boldly on your feet, even if the whole world around you is collapsing, this is a huge plus. You will be able to evaluate actions from the outside and act with a cool mind.
30. Spontaneity is a mental state in which a person does not adhere to the strict framework of conservative behavior, but shows liveliness and varied interests. Of course, this is a little childish behavior, but colleagues always like a lot of sincerity and friendliness.
31. Adequacy – understanding and perception of reality as it is. If you understand exactly how to determine the degree of complexity of a situation and select the necessary reaction, you are an adequate person.
32. Spirituality – the presence of a rich spiritual world. If you try to understand your existence, where, why, why and how you live, believe in God and recognize the divine essence of human existence, you will be a very interesting person to communicate with.
33. Integrity - exposure to certain postulates of behavior. If, in spite of everything, you do not betray your inner principles, but live guided by them, then you are an integral person, non-capricious and consistent.
34. Positivity – non-aggressive perception of the world around us, good deeds and sublime thoughts. This is a defensive reaction of the psyche; life is much easier for a person with positive thinking.
35. Tactfulness – understanding the boundaries of the interlocutor’s personal zone. If you understand that some things simply cannot be asked of people, since they are painful for them, if you know how to stop in time at the barrier of separating general topics from intimate ones, you have a sense of tact.
36. Delicacy - a gentle approach to the problems of the interlocutor. Delicate people are valued for their ability not to open the complexes in the personalities and lives of other people.
37. Objectivity – the ability to concentrate on one object, realistically assessing all the pros and cons of a situation, and not superimposing one’s own feelings on the assessment of the situation. This can also include self-criticism, since such a person will definitely not allow emotions to prevail over reason and is aware of the state of things based on the standards of thinking.
38. Impulsivity is the tendency to act on the first impulse, spontaneously. Sometimes this quality helps in solving production problems.
39. Flexibility is a person’s ability to adapt to changing conditions.
40. Ability to speak foreign languages. If you have linguistic abilities, this is a definite item on the list of advantages.
